How do I get to the point where I am confident with the decisions I am making regarding the welfare of my child? These first 2 months have been easy- now, with his 2 month appointment and vaccines coming up, I'm going crazy with doubt. I want to get him vaccinated, I'm just not sure if I like how many vaccines they do all at once. I'm afraid to make the wrong the choice. I'm afraid I'll never be okay with whatever choice I make.
And this is only just the beginning. I've always had a problem with trusting myself, so how can I trust that I can make the right choices for my son regarding ANY issue? I know that everyone makes mistakes, but if over the next 18 or so years of Keegan's life, I freak like this over every single decision, that won't be good for him (or me!) either. I never had to worry about any of this with Jayden, because while I can have opinions on what is best for her, I ultimately can not make those decisions.
The first choice I had to make for him was to keep him intact or to cut him- I am super confident in my decision with that, but I wonder if that is the last time I will ever feel that way.
I have a problem with assertiveness as well- so how am I supposed to step up and defend and ask questions regarding the care of my son when I am so uncomfortable asserting myself to people in authority (doctors, even daycare workers) or anyone I don't trust 100% of the time? I think the only person I am truly assertive with all the time is my husband.
I guess I just have to figure it out, somehow.